Bassin' at GBL

Charlie Spinnerbait,

     I have news for you that will Just make you slap your grandma. Today I went to Gooney Bird Lake to learn some new techniques and prepare myself in case we ever fish there. Boy did I ever learn alot. You might think I spelt that wrong, but it is the way, going forward, that I will be saying that.

     You remember Ernest P. Worrell ? That was Jim Varney's "go to" name. Mine has changed. No longer can I go by Billy Basser. Alas and alack. My new name is Willie P. Coltrane. Tats right. Me an' ole Ernest are ow in the same boat (so to speak. I ain't dead yet).

     Let me esplane how this here happened. As I was saying, I was at GBL today for some learnin' exercises. This cud take a whole lotta time. Here goes.

     Started off by gettin' up late (way past 4:30) Started to leave witout the boat, Duh, heres your sign (I get many today)! Correctet that error and got on down the road.

     Put in at the ramp without incident, except for havin' to walk in the water to get on board. Went to my first spot without incident.

     Den the bad stuff started happenin'. I was at my second spot, throwin'my chartruse Rat'L Trap. I wasn't catchin'nothin' sos I was goin' to change to a more conventional color, when I don't know what happened. All I saw when the lites came back on, wasn't a pretty site.

     Picture youe ring finger pulled tight to the fleshy part of your palm (just blow the thumb). Go ahead touch yourself there. No, not THERE. That's where mine were, and that was attached to the back part of my seat ( not of my pants, you twit). Hold your ring finger to your palm and hole them agin' your seat.

     How I got here is still a mystery. I had two prongs of one treble hook holdin' my hand together, past the barbs, and one prong of the other treble hook in the uppullstry. Thank the Good Lord that these were on my left hand. I was able to get to my handy plirs (close by) and rip the hook out of the uppulstry so I could at least see what damage I had cauzed. Finally pulled one barb out of the meet of my hand, pushed the other one thru past the barb and cut the dang thing off ( the barb) so I could pull the barbless prong back out of my hand.

     Got out my trusty first aid kit (have one in yur boat?) and put some bandages on my wounds so they wudent bleed all over the boat. Gud so far? Then I actually started catchen fishes. Well, had them on anyway. Quality fishes too. Rat'l Trap and crankbaits. boy was I excited.

     Things were pretty quiet for quite a while. Then I lost my new "go too crankbait" on a keeper fishes. Had him rite beside the boat, only wrapped around a big stik.

     Stayed on 'til I broke my line and tried to net him. No more mister "go to crankbait". Still devestated about that. Small yellow ugly square billed crankbait. Gon forever. Woe is me.

     Caught many small basses on Rat'l Traps and Carolinah rigs. Caught one Keeper (my limit) on the rig. Stuck one more hook in my finger (different finger, same sutpiddity). Then the day got funny.

     Put on a different crankbait (lost my go to) and started catchin fishes again. Threw tween two docks and got hammered (fishes bit). Gud fishes. Tuk me around a dock pilin' and got off. Wanted my crankbait back so I pulled out my famous David Fritts lure retriever, hooked it over the line so it cud slide down the line and free my lur.

     Did I tell you it was windy? Bout 25 knots I guess. Anyhow, wind is blowin me all over the place. I get my lur retreiver wrapped up in my trollin motor. Had to untange that afore I cud get my lur back. Did that. Got my lur back, along with a head shakin laugh.

     All you can do when yur day end up like that. Did I say end ? Not yet. My next cast I got caught again on another dock. Got the retreiver to wurk halfway rite. Caught a lur on the boat deck before I could get it in the water and afer the stuk one. Enough for one day you say ?

     Mostly so. I got bak to the dock, and decided to let the one keeper I had go. Had to get in the lifewell and pull the plug at the bottom of it sos I could drain some water out (my pumpout motor for that side was not workin).

     That fishes new I was in there and got bout a gallon of water all over me. Know how cold that water is rite now? You don't wantu. Brrrrr.

     As U mita noticed, I am riting this, sos I did get home. Can I moralize this ? If yur fishin alone and U R anythin lik me, don't !

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